Thoughts on a Shindig
by khambilo
Summary: Shindig is one of my favorite episodes, though I do like them all. So much happens in Shindig for each of the characters even though it’s largely a Mal/Inara centric episode. I decided to fill in some plot gaps to that episode, but also elaborate on each.
1. River

Disclaimer: All of Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon.

* * *

River wanted the captain to pick her to dance with at the party. She loved dancing so much and it had been years since she had actually been to a ball. Kaylee was still in her greasy coveralls when she left the ship with captain and as soon as the door shut with a resolute thud that sent vibrations the through the air and metal that her brain perceived as sound, she let her head fall.

"Doesn't even know how to dance."

With that River, proceeds to have her own ball. A few spare crates supply scenery and the captain's coat supplies a dance partner. That's when she discovers the lack of music. She makes her own music by humming a tune based on mathematically assigned pitches in an algorithmic sequence that supply melody and chord structure.

The tune is happy a jaunty at times but slowly shifts to something reminiscent of Tchaikovsky's "Marche Slave." She rocks back and forth, enjoying the algorithmic sequence she created.

She leads the coat-partner in a semi-turn, approximately pi halves in radians or ninety degrees. Dance is a careful calculation she comes to realize. It makes her cohesive, and she likes that, but she suddenly feels lonesome, and hungry. And she knows she can't join the pilot and his wife's party; that's private and doesn't much amend the hunger issue. In fact, the activity they're engaging in is a form of cardio-vascular activity that burns calories. River hops on one foot. No she'll join the men in the mess.


	2. Wash

**Disclaimer**: All of Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon

* * *

Wash had a little bit of money saved up. Not a lot, but when he heard Zoe say she would want a slinky dress (and when he asked the captain for money and got none) he knew exactly what he wanted to do with that money.

He waited until they got back to the ship after running errands then asked her, "Do you want to burn up some more of that shore leave?"

She gave a radiant smile and asked, "Where are we going?"

He takes her back to the shopping district, though as soon as they enter, he playfully blindfolds her with his hands. She laughs and he jokes about their destination without revealing a thing about it. It proceeds in this way until he finally removes his hands and she sees she's in a fashion boutique. Dresses, they are the prettiest gowns Zoe had ever seen.

She looks to her husband with a questioning glance and he replies, "You said you wanted a slinky dress."

She laughs for a moment before she looks for a dress. It doesn't take her long to do so; there seems to be this one dress that is drawing her in.

She points it out to her husband and smiles, "Let me go try it on."

"And make me wait out here," he says quizzically, "You're such a tease."

She goes to the dressing room, and within a moment returns, slowly making her way to her husband. He's sure his jaw has fallen to the floor. She looks so beautiful in that cross-patterned white dress. He knows this dress is the one.

But more than anything, he can't wait to get her out of it back on the ship.


	3. Zoe

**Disclaimer:** All of Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon

* * *

Zoe has a lot to thank her husband for.

The first would be for her rescue. After the war, people like her and the captain were pretty torn up. Torn up to a point that they became scattered reflections of the people they were before the war. Many former Browncoats simply ceased to be in a way. They fade to their vices, and withdrew until there was nothing left to anchor them to this world.

Mal had found an anchor for himself; it was the ship, it was Serenity. The ship gave him that hope that even though everything had been torn from him, he had something to call his.

And though Zoe joined Mal on his new-found Serenity, she couldn't call it hers, it wasn't her anchor.

But she found it eventually, thanks to Mal. Mal was initially not too fond of Wash and Zoe. It was one of the many mysteries of Mal's psyche that Zoe decided she wouldn't dwell on. So she told Mal that she needed Wash in the way that Mal needed Serenity. She needed him to anchor her to this world, to show her that a life existed for her after the war.

Wash had been exactly what she needed. She could picture herself without him, impossibly grave at every word and every action. With Wash, everyday was filled with laughter. Every day had a soul.

Laughter was the second thing she needed to thank him for. That was a given.

The most recent thing she needed to thank him for was for the dress, and she was sure she could find the appropriate way to thank him when they got back to the ship.


	4. Kaylee

**Disclaimer:** ....I think you get the picture by now...

* * *

Kaylee could hardly contain herself as soon as she realized what job the captain had for, and that moment was as soon as they rounded the corner into the shopping district of Persephone. She had overheard talk of a fancy party from Wash and Zoe, and then she simply had to put two and two together. Of course she asked the captain to confirm, and all he said was "Yes, now get yourself that fluffy layer cake."

Kaylee squeals and scampers into the store, immediately telling the clerk she wants the ruffly, pink dress. The clerk is surprised at first, but smiles at Kaylee's energy. She's all too happy to fit Kaylee into that dress anyway.

She gingerly passes the rig to Kaylee, which Kaylee embraces with child-like happiness. The captain enters at that moment.

"Now try not to rip it before we even get ya in it," he says in mock grouchiness.

"Xie Xie, Captain," she says excitedly and runs for the dressing room. Once there it takes her a bit to figure out how to put the dress on; she's never worn something so fancy in her life before, but she manages.

She takes a moment to look at herself in the mirror. It's the most beautiful thing she's ever seen, and in that moment, she decides she will wear it on her wedding day. She can picture it ever so clearly. It's on some homely world of some sort. Serenity's just landed and the cargo bay door has extended down as to function as an "aisle" for the ceremony. Everyone has gotten so spruced up, even Jayne, though he has a cigar hanging out of the corner of his mouth. Wash is wearing a big bow tie, which looks odd in comparison to Zoe's dress, maybe even the slinky dress she knows he bought her. And the captain, well he looks so out of place in those fancy clothes, but he's smiling just like the rest of them. Inara is her maid of honor, wearing a matching pink dress of her own, though nothing to outshine the bride; it is her day after all. River gleefully takes on the role of flower girl. She doesn't have real flower petals so she throws cut up bits of foil that once contained protein packs. An old rendition of the wedding march is playing over Serenity's intercom; someone likely had to search on the cortex for hours looking for that old tune. The captain extends his arm to Kaylee as the tune begins, escorting her down the "aisle" to the groom. He whispers something funny to her as they walk and Kaylee laughs as she is "given away" to Simon.

Oh, Simon.

He looks even more swai than usual! His hair is slicked neatly to his head and he's wearing the nicest of his tailored outfits, quite possible his last complete set from his core world days.

Shepherd Book is right between them, his bible in hand. He has an ear-to-ear smile that in itself is a wedding present. He begins to read some scripture, but she would not remember a word he was saying; she is already lost in the groom's eyes. She feels as if she's falling closer to him, when she realizes she kind of is. It's magical and beautiful all at once, and to top it off, Simon's face is nearly inches from hers.

There's a sharp knock at the dressing room door. Kaylee's lips are inches away from her reflection. She laughs at the funny face she didn't even catch herself making.

"Kaylee, you almost done in there? You realized we actually have to be at the party for the dress to be worth it, right?"

"Comin' , cap'n!" She thinks about what the captain had to say. He was wrong; even if they weren't goin' to some fancy shindig, the dress would be plenty worth it. She smiles at that thought, because wearing that dress, makes her fantasy seem a bit closer, more attainable.

But that was enough musing. The Captain and her have a fancy party to go to, and she couldn't wait to see what he was wearing.


	5. Jayne

* * *

Jayne hates it when people look down on him. It rides him and irks him like nothing in the 'verse can.

The problem is, on Serenity, he's worked himself to the "looked down" place as the ship's muscle for hire.

Hell, he knows he does plenty of stupid things, he just wishes some would tell him when he's made an ass of himself. At least the doctor has enough sense to do that.

But like the look the captain gave him this morning after he asked if Kaylee was mad….Or when Mal looked at him funny when he completed Badger's sentence with "pretentious" – yeah Mal, he has a vocabulary that consists more of "gose" and "gorramit."

By today Jayne has had enough with the stupid routine. So as Mal takes Kaylee to his fancy party, Jayne heads back to town and into a bookstore. The clerk there is some soft-hands-clean-suit-glasses type like the doc, and he is startled by mercenary's appearance.

Jayne gruffly slaps a small handful of coins on the counter and narrows his eyes on the clerk.

"I need all the books I can buy with this that'll make me smart."


	6. Inara

* * *

She was dancing with Atherton, flicking eyes and all, but for those brief moments when her eyes flicked away, she was stealing glances at Mal. Discretely, of course, she shuddered to think of how Atherton would react if he knew she was eyeing another man on his time, but she quickly amended that thought: she wasn't "eyeing" another man: Malcolm Reynolds could hardly be called even that. He was a low life, degenerate captain with a "spotty" reputation at best.

Atherton tells her a joke, something about Francesca Allemonde and the country club, to which Inara objectively giggles. He follows it up with a suggestive remark, which Inara also laughs at but quells him with a feminine plea to stop. He smiles and complies, and she takes the opportunity to flick her eyes once more. Mal is by one of the massive pillars talking stiffly with a count or baron of some sort. He stares back, stopping in his conversation, and she flicks her eyes back to Atherton.

This time she is found out. Atherton catches the flicking eyes. He candidly asks her what has drawn her attention and she covers by asking him who the man in the sash is. He tells her he is Sir Warrick Harrow and gallantly offers to introduce her to him. Inara can see what is quickly coming, and she attempts to politely deny the introduction, but Atherton insists. At this, she is instantly thrown off guard, her mind racing ten times faster than her feet. What will she say? How will she act? Of course if Mal were a client those questions would be easy to answer, but the thought of Mal as a client, well…laughable really, and why the hell did that come to her mind?

Indecision becomes her demeanor, a stiff, almost angry stance in comparison to the fluid, yet composed stance she had as Atherton's escort. She can't believe that her companion training has been offset by a backwater transport ship captain, but that's a dilemma she'll have to contemplate later.

A moment passes and they have joined Mal and Harrow, Inara trying so hard not to flick her eyes.

"Sorry to interrupt. Sir Warrick Harrow, I believe I know you from the club."

Mal's staring at her, which doesn't make the whole situation much better, but he smiles, and that has to count for something.

She quickly smiles back. "Captain, this is Atherton Wing. Atherton, Captain Mal Reynolds," she somehow manages to say with composure.

"Pleased to meet'cha," he says as he shakes Atherton's hand. It was nearly laughable to see these men behaving like this, sizing each other up, but Inara's face remains a mask the whole time.

Mal quickly comes back to her, "Inara, I didn't realize you were going to this party."

Her composure breaks for the first time as she says "It's the only party," a bit too icily than perhaps she initially wanted to.

Mal quips stupidly on her remark in the most Mal-like way possible, and she darts her eyes away, in annoyance or maybe something else, maybe so she can avoid laughing at what he just said in front of Atherton.

Mal turns his head back to Harrow but his eyes remain fixated on her and Atherton. He's the first of everyone there to notice Atherton's harsh, possessive grip on her arm, even Inara.

"Ath. Can I call you Ath," Mal asks candidly, but enough to irk Atherton. There is the slightest of pauses where she realizes exactly what Mal is doing. "Inara has spoken of you to me. She has made a point of your generosity. Given that, I'm sure you wouldn't mind if I ask Inara the favor of a dance."

This time Inara can't stop her eyes from flicking to Mal. If they could speak, they would be screaming "What the hell do you think you're doing!" at Mal above the quiet din of the party.

And Atherton is not a foolish man. He knows exactly what the captain has done. Social entrapment. This was the sort of thing Inara saw often from people who were born and raised in the plush lifestyle of the Core Worlds. Manipulation, in which one cannot deny another's request for fear of a tarnished image. It was the last thing she expected from Mal.

Atherton can only smile and give his approval, and Inara's mask most certainly crumbles. Mal was messing with an exceedingly jealous man.

But he chivalrously takes her hand after politely smiling, nonetheless. In truth she's somewhat relieved, though she will act otherwise.

Because even though they've just joined hands, they had been dancing together all night.


	7. Mal

* * *

And to think this all began with a good punch to a dandy's face and a "s'what?"…

Mal is alone in one of Atherton Wing's plush accommodations, set up for the night so he won't run off. He wouldn't run off anyway, he had decided that when he first threw the punch.

The problem was, why did he think that? Put simply, he did it to defend Inara's honor, but then again, how much honor did she have to begin with. She was a companion, and that was something Mal had no time for, because above all, companions are liars: They lie to their clients, making them feel special and loved for a fee, and they lie to themselves, by saying in the end, it doesn't really matter to them. Well at least Inara is that way. He can see the lies in her eyes as she returns from an engagement, and her fears for her, because he can see those lies are replacing her, who she is, the woman he admires.

He has a sword and he's making quite the fool of himself, throwing himself about the chamber, swinging at an invisible Atherton.

He doesn't even want to think about her right now. Now all he should be concentrated on surviving the next twenty four hours.

He swings once more, this time with more strength. The sword makes a neat sound of vibrating metal.

He can't stand the thought of what she could be doing with Atherton right now. He's put his life in danger for her, and she sleeps with the man anyway.

And this isn't the first time she's treated him in this manner. He knows he has trouble voicing his thoughts. It's one of his major flaws, though he'd never admit it. So he tries to let her know how he feels in other ways, and he can see in her eyes that she knows what he's doing, yet she continues on…companioning!

He gives the sword a couple more callous swings.

Why the hell is he doing this. She's made it quite clear how she feels about him….

Well actually she hasn't….

Is this his way of proving himself to her, he can finally hear something from her either way.

God, this is ridiculous: he's mooring over a woman, at a time like this!

He goes back to the sword play; by now his invisible Atherton is reduced to a diced-up pile. Of course that probably won't reflect what will actually happen. More than likely, he'll be the diced up pile.

He lets the sword fall for a moment and runs a hand through his hair.

That's it. He has to make some things known tonight. He may very well die in the morning and he's gonna have the last word. He's gonna tell her something, he doesn't know what it will be yet or how it will come to happen but—

"Mal."

He tries to stifle his voice, but his immediate reaction is to whip to the source of the voice and in doing so; he plants his sword in the pillar.

She's there, he never heard to door open. Impeccable timing.

"What are you doing here," he asks her oddly. It may have something to do with the fact that he had just been thinking about her, intently.

She lets herself in.

"Atherton's a heavy sleeper, night before a big day," she says. "He's got a killing in the morning, then a haircut later."


	8. Book

Why they called the short, scruffy man "Badger" had been a mystery to Shepherd Book, but when that gangster came aboard Serenity, with guns to young Kaylee's head, he knew exactly why in his own mind: A badger is a ground dwelling animal, a bottom feeder, in a sense, and so was this Badger, using the lowest methods of coercion to achieve is ends.

But the time for mentally insulting this man has passed. Now, Badger's goons patrol the cargo bay in a demeaning and irreverent sort of way. This ship was their home.

That thought troubled the Shepherd. And abbey or church had always been his home, and before that, well home wasn't in his vocabulary before his abbey days, and Serenity was a transport vessel. In theory, it takes you from point A to point B. Book's journey had a point A, but no real point B. In a way, point B was the ship itself. At first, he wasn't so sure about this. He prayed and prayed, petitioning God for an answer concerning where point B was.

"God works in mysterious ways, brother," the head shepherd of the Southdown Abbey had told him.

That was true, because the answer returned that Serenity was point B. Serenity was where he was meant to be. That was especially troubling concerning what he had witnessed within the first twenty-four hours of his arrival. Crime, theft, bigotry, even murder.

Book knew all too well that God doesn't bless the faithful with easy lives, and after Whitefall, he knew there was more to come.

It scared him to think that. Already he had beaten a man senseless. That stirred up a part of the shepherd he never wanted to reenact again.

He waits in the cargo bay like the rest of the crew: quietly and without noise. He prays first.

"Lord, lead me to you words. Help me find the strength to persevere through adversity," He prays silently.

With that he lets God direct what he reads: He opens his bible and the pages fall open as if by chance to exactly what he needs to see: Psalm 23. He reads: "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

This Psalm becomes an anthem for him. They were words he had read many times back at the abbey, but until now, this moment, he has not truly found the meaning in them. In that moment, he realizes why God has directed life to Serenity: they needed a shepherd. The crew needed someone to love them despite who they were and where they had been.

"I believe each of us has a mission out there waiting for us, Book," the head Shepherd told him. "And when that mission is revealed to us, we know without a doubt, that's where we ought to be. It's one of the most satisfying feelings to offer unconditional love to those who need it. I pray that you may one day find that."

He thanks God for showing him this, and when he opens his eyes, young River is crooning her head into the cargo bay. He draws in a stiff breath and thanks God once again for letting him see River before Badger's men did.

He slowly makes his way towards Simon, as to not draw attention, and places a hand on the doctor's shoulder. The doctor will be able to help her, while Book prays for God's supervision over the situation.


	9. Simon

Disclaimer: All of Firefly belongs to Joss Whedon

* * *

"Ante up, gentlemen," Simon says casually. He gives a brief glance to his pile of "chips" below, which were really just tattered bits of paper with chores written on them. He peruses them momentarily then tosses one in. "Dishes."

Shepherd Book gives him a look, an intense one albeit, since they are indeed playing for the duties roster. The last time they played, Book had been stuck with septic vac duties thanks to Jayne, and it seemed to Simon that Book had been looking to repay that kindness.

"Dishes," the shepherd antes, "Could do with less of those."

Jayne has a similar look, but his meaning is to get out of as many duties as possible, "Garbage."

With that Simon deals the hand, five cards to a player, the beat of metal cards sliding across the worn surface of the mess table echoes through the room. Once dealt, he places his hand on the stack of round cards. "Tall card," he begins officiously, then draws and places that card with a neat snap, "Plum. Plums are tall."

Simon looks at his dealt hand and tries not to cringe. It' bad, and he's not looking forward to the impending list of chores.

Book is the first to go. "I'll take two," he say's calculatingly and Simon snaps two cards from the deck to Book.

Jayne next. He gives a skeptical look to his hand then a neutral game face to Simon, "Speakin' of garbage, I'll take three."

Simon deals accordingly, "Three," then looks at the tall card, "and dealer forced to claim the tall." He sighs, "I'd've cleared the flower side if it wasn't for this."

He lets himself to his seat, contemplating a move. Since Simon had first come to Serenity he had been continually surprised on how much life differed out here in the black from life in the core worlds. The fighting, the rim-worlds, the overall ruthlessness of most folk.

But there was one thing that surprised him above all these, and it wasn't a difference between the core worlds and the rest of the 'verse. It was a similarity.

It was Tall Card.

Jayne had first extended the invitation of a game of tall card not long after that whole incident on Whitefall. Simon was nearly floored by the invitation. After leaving Osiris, Simon had expected to never hear of something as trivial as a card game he played on the core world again. Jayne had probably been looking for an easy mark when he offered, and he was so very dismayed when he lost to Simon that first time, badly.

Simon had learned to play Tall Card from one of the best: his father. His father would take him to this social outing and that, and a friendly game of tall card had naturally been the game of choice. Simon was never allowed to play, it was "unbecoming of a young boy to gamble" or so his father said, so he watched, or more accurately observed, for he never really just watched something. He was always thinking, always calculating. He watched the intricacies of the game, the exchange of cards, the anteing, and the chancy strategies that involved the tall card. He had even made paper versions of the deck so he could practice at home.

When he was thirteen, he finally gathered the courage to ask his father if he could play. His father probably figured it was time for him to join the club, or some elitist thinking like that, and let him join a game he and his friends had been playing. Within an hour, Simon had cleared his father and his father's friends out. He used the money to buy a microscope.

Simon's skills at a trivial card game were the only things that truly helped him adjust to life on the rim. Those skills were the only things he could thank his father for now.

Except those skills were not availing him at the moment. He heard Jayne say he folded.

"Me too. This tall card's round my neck like a weight."


End file.
